letter to the editor

being that the universe is centered around you. i did not expect that you would ask why such a abrupt and immediate retreat from what we both expected to be a amaing, and long awaited homecoming. thus, i will answer out of my own curiousity, and need to let it all go, the multiple reasons to such a profound turn around time on the trip i just like to call, montana.

at first it seemed as through i was welcome, in the cold, damp hole referred to as the living space. then, as the minutes in front of the television drug on...i began to realize, this is most definately not the most ideally picture of amaing amounts of fun i initially longed for. the final straw was only a mere few days into the visit, which in the reality of God's grace, i appreciate, that i no longer had to spend another waking moment inside of this picture that i so wanted to be in, was the event of a dinner invitation...no, not extended not to me, it seemed to only be a private party, just the two of them, guests from out of town not welcome.

with the realization of the selfishness and singling out, i did what any good woman would do, and come up with a excuse, which a week prior would have been the honest truth, alas, was a week too late to do what i now know needed to be done. and get in my compact vehicle and drive away. and what a drive that was.

--

as we age

you are born unto this earth with one life.
one shot at doing what you are meant to come here to do, one shot at seeing the things you want to see, doing the things you want to do, and most importantly, to me, being with the people you feel at home with.
for 20 years of your life, you were grounded with your family. they were your home. then you grow up a little more and find other individuals whom you connect more with.
well, what happens when the family, that you are so connected too, age?
are you supposed to put your experiences on hold to help them or do you let other family members step in?
i mean, as long as they are getting taken care of and they know that you are there for them....
i feel like even if you are close by, you don't physically need to be here with them.
for me, its all a part of being there for them, sending them positive energy and love.

anything's possible

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im back...this time...at a whole new energy level

things have happened.
life has been an interesting period of adjustment after returning back from the land called India.
i was happy to be back in America...and then i was sad. sad that everyone and everything around me is so damn busy, and turbulent, and on the go, and filled with egos, and just not interested in sitting down and listening to what really might be talking inside of their heads.
i decided to sit down for everyone. i am currently in a period of respecting my inner self. after working in a bike shop for the majority of the summer...with a bunch of complete and utter assholes, boss included. its time for me to regain my confidence and esteem that i found crushed under the attack of an Italian new yorker. (yes, stereotyping...real yogic.)
what have i decided?
that life is AMAZING! and beautiful, and perfect, and a process...
i make my ends meet. i pay my credit card off when it comes due. don't ask me how. the important thing is. that i am enjoying my life.
i am giving myself the time that i need to do what i need to do.
i know that i cannot live in the front range of Colorado.
i am moving to Montana. yes, it may be the winter season, and yes, i normally move south for winter.
however,
i have decided that i need the change of seasons and i will embrace it.
i am happy to be back on the blog.....maybe i will even get a couple of days straight on this thing.
you never know.

welp, thought i could do it.

i guess a blog is just a hard thing for me to keep up.

i live in the moment 100% and it is hard to get me to a computer to type some things.

well...to those of you still in the lauren blog world...a tip for the day.

 

slow down.

being back in the states i see a lot of people running around in their lives, so, so busy, hardly being aware of the beauty and peace around them.

i mean, whats the point to life if you cant slow down and smell the roses, if you will.

its funny, to stay busy is like the goal in america. well, it is such a beautiful thing to take some time, sit down and drink some tea. or read a book. or do something for you.

 

todays goal, find peace wherever you may be and in every moment.

 

thank you for your time.

--
Synchronously,
Lauren

really a simple being here folks.

needless to say, it has been a quite interesting week here at the ashram in rishikesh. spending far too much time with a group of fellow yogis has been a blessing and a curse...well, who am i kidding, mostly a curse. we are all here for different reasons, mine personally being a reason of becoming one with myself, finding my confidence and being able to share what i have learned with people back home. a lot of others people's reasoning for coming here has been overwhelming mine, and the energy that majority of them i have had to learn how to counteract with mine more simply. i have learned that i am a simple being, on the way to finding a balance of all things dual. i am grateful for this, and find myself more and more so with every passing day spent with this group. my guru vishva is nothing but supportive. an amazing yogi and full of laughter. for that i am grateful.

all things simple today. make it a priority to find the balance between whatever you may find as challenging.

we are on our way to a beach on the bank of the ganges...will be in touch!

loves. lauren

--

self respect.

yoga class...5:30a.m...up...6a.m. class. the theme for the class this
morning wa self respect...which, by the way, i was up at 3am this
morning...part of it was that in correlation to my work out routine
back in the states which begins at around 3pm, my energy level was at
a all time high early...the other part was....what in the heck do i
want to be doing upon my return to the states??
well, needless to say, how terrible to be racking my brain about such
a topic while in the very place i need to just be and embrace...thus,
the theme this morning was quite fitting and i did a lot of meditating
on the topic of self respect in the early morning hours of january
29...
the conclusion, respect my heart, follow my heart, embrace this moment
of amazingness in the foothills of the himalayas and just be.
my wish for you today is to surrender and be with the grace of your own respect.
much love.

--

a cup of chai tea and the himalayas...

what an absolutely amazing journey this has been thus far...a really long flight but so worth the hip flexor trouble. i am at the foothills of the himalayas, which, like the foothills of colorado, are windy right now. one mountain range to the next. the mountains here, however, are way bigger, and i havent even seen the start of them yet! the highways here are unbelieveable, one false move from your hero bicycle into the way of a seriously speeding population of vehicles, and you are done with, absolutely crushed. sometimes, back home, i will shout out at the speeding cars, this is a neighboorhood area...but here, its very creative out of the lines, so defensive, drive bys. the air...smokey but a scent that is really one of a kind. i was expecting the airport to be quite of a busy little place, not the case, very mellow, very easy to get around. on the drive up to rishikesh, i noticed that i never really saw any women out and about...i figure that is my goal now, where are the women! i will find them. i have begun my studies of the yoga poses and philosophies and today we will be escorted into town to meet some locals. i know i will find some local friends.

well, breakfast time now...i will let you know how our journey to the Ganges waterfall pans out tomorrow.

love you all!

L

awareness + positive thoughts = happy life

"the most precious gift we can offer others is our presence. when mindfulness embraces those we love, they will bloom like flowers." -thich nhat hanh.
to be mindful is to be continual aware of the thoughts and situations flowing through your mind. i know, when i was trying to go to sleep last night, random stories and thoughts kept working through my busy little mind. as soon as i became aware of the thoughts, i could control what it was that my mind had come up with. my awareness helped control my thoughts to those of rest. finally, i guess i must have fallen asleep.
i believe that, the thoughts that we think, whether good nor bad, are  released into the universe and help to control the direction of our individual pursuits. the law of attraction, if you will...from 'the secret.'
the ability to control and be aware of your constanting changing mind states, and the power to change them into positive, beautiful thoughts is for me, a wonderful place to be in.

the mobile device upload

testing, testing, 1, 2, 3...

--
Synchronously,
Lauren Bleck

one week til the ultimate selfish and selfless journey...

i leave for india in less than one week. my feelings are quite simple at this point. get me on the airplane and get me there. i want to submerge myself into this foreign culture and learn as much as i possibly can, which, if you do not know me, can be a lot.
i want to be empty. empty of thoughts and stories. i want my mind to be clear upon this pending journey and i want to be able to communicate the clarity with everyone. to be able to live in society is to establish who you are first. to be able to know essentually enlightenment and to be able to approach this buddhism like stage with grace free from pride.
one week away. how amazing to be as fortunate as myself, to grasp the happiness that i can and to be able to spread happiness around.